The Dialogue Series Part 1

                                                TIME AND CHANCE

The challenges of this life can sometimes be so overwhelming that you wonder if they were really meant for you. They are so real and personal that it is almost impossible to think my way out of them. Pretending to be happy doesn’t seem to ease the stress either . I know because I’ve tried it, so many times. Smiling through it does not work for these grown up problems. It used to when I was younger; I would just force myself to smile and my mind would automatically shift to happy thoughts and I could feel myself relaxing.

These days I find it is only wine and Chess that seem to be making life a little bearable. I wouldn’t recommend either to anyone with a weak heart and a weak mind. They are both very potent and quite addictive; but they are also very effective in helping me deal with the current state of my life, whether separately or in combination.

I was sitting alone at home on a Tuesday and felt my head about to explode from all the miserable thoughts that wouldn’t stop ringing. I decided to pick up my chess set and a bottle of wine and visit one of my older friends for a game.

“I am losing my grip on this life, man!” I said, while setting up the chess board on his garden table under the mango tree in his front yard.

“Don’t tell me you are also considering hanging yourself?! Are you?” he asked with some seriousness that is uncharacteristic of him. I figured he was more curious than serious in the solemn manner of the word. He was wondering if it was possible that old happy me could think that way.

“I have learned not to resign unless I have thoroughly considered all possible options and determined there is no way out. I am still considering my options but it’s quite clear that I am losing; either the queen or the game and I feel I am running out of time.”

“Hold it right there! Don’t say another word until you have a glass with wine in it.” He rushed into the house and came back carrying a corkscrew and two wine glasses; he pulled the wine from my side of the table and quickly opened it. He poured a glassful for me and poured half a glass for himself. “You need this more” he said “what’s really going on man?”

I took a good sip and looked at him with a comforting smile, “Did I make it sound like it was too serious? I am really sorry my friend; I didn’t mean to get you worried. I was just talking in general, life is hard! It’s like playing a game against Banele; you are constantly defending; dealing with problems after problems, you don’t get any peace. You just never catch a breath to at least plan an attack and be hopeful about something.”

I wanted to talk to him about my personal problems but felt I would be burdening him. It’s obvious that he has his own problems to deal with judging from the grave face his wife met me with when I was coming in.

He chuckled at the Banele reference and added “Yeah, that boy is very dangerous. He almost made me quit chess last year. But as it turns out my addiction is stronger than the pain of losing from him. I have made my peace with suffering in his hands, the rest of you will have to suffer the consequences. You know the saying ‘hurt people hurt people’ right? The rest of you will be my victims.”

I played my first move pushing the pawn in front of the king to e4 and solemnly asked “Do you feel like a king in your kingdom my friend?”

“I used to! In the glory days. These days I have to fight just to feel like a man. I have to remind people that I am the man of the house. Or just a man in the house.  An angry man. That’s worse than a pawn in my mind. Kings are not angry, they are graceful and confident. Not me. At least not anymore. I have lost my grace. This life can be very testing.” He pushed c5.

“You have no idea just how much I understand you my friend. I feel like I am drained of all my strength from all this testing you are referring to. If I don’t die this year, I am definitely going to thrive next year.” 2. Nc3

“Talk to me man, what’s eating you up?” 2…Nc6

“Its just one stress on top of another. You remember that NGO I worked for?” 3. Bb5

“Yes, that Million touchie-touchie or something?” 3...Nf6

“That very one. Earlier this year in March they send me a letter saying they will not be able to pay my salary for the next two months due to lack of funding. They guaranteed that by the first of June we will resume all programs. I made plans for the two months without income ensuring that my family has the bare minimum they need for sustenance, assuring them that we will take care of everything else June Month-end. They understood even though it wasn’t easy. I have two teenage kids and a three-year-old to think of here; not forgetting my pensioner mom who seems to be carrying the burden in this trying times.” 4. Bxc6

“Yes, yes; and that beautiful wife of yours. Why do you leave her out?” 4…bxc6

“This woman spends so much time at her mom’s house I’m not sure I’m allowed to call her my wife” 5. d6

“Don’t you dare speak that way. I went and paid her lobola for you myself. That is your wife man.”5…g6

“I hear you my friend, but that is an issue for later. I need us to discuss it as well. Now back to that Million people matter and their false promises.

“So I return to the office on the 1^st of June expecting to be welcomed back but instead I’m told the programs funding is not in yet, they will let me know when it is. I go back home and let the family know things are not back to normal yet. They were obviously disappointed. My mom was obviously annoyed; she didn’t even hide it. She asked me ‘did they tell you when it will be in, because their letter was specific that you will be returning to work today?’

“I told her they did not and walked away. I didn’t want to get into an emotional engagement on that issue. I didn’t want to show them I was also disappointed lest they lose their confidence in me.” I played 6. Nge2 and took a sip of wine to calm my nerves.

 

“I know what you mean.” My friend responded, “at first you had the official backing of a letter and it was betrayed and now you only have a word of mouth without any guarantees. That’s tough.” 6…d6

“So now I had to deal with everyone taking turns asking me if I was going in this week or not. Each time I would call someone from the office to check and get the same answer. June ended, then July and August. I realized that I needed to move on so I wrote an email to the director requesting that they help me close this chapter so that I can at least apply for my Unemployment Insurance Fund in the meantime while trying to move on.” 7. b3

“Eish, Ja man! Even though that UIF payout would not be much but at least it would be some income. So you are saying you have not had income since end of March?” 7…Bg7

“Yes! Six full months. If it was not for the invitations I get to officiate in Chess tournaments I would be all bones, depressed and  maybe even abusive. Hurt people hurt people, right?” 8. Rb1

“True. So did you end up getting that UIF?” 8…O-O

“That is the interesting part of this story. You see the old HR and Finance officer had resigned during this period of non-payment so they had to hire a new one. The new HR person asked me to send my contract through because apparently she could not locate it from that small office. Which was weird but I later figured that she only wanted to confirm if I still had it.” 9. O-O

“Why would she not be upfront with you, I don’t understand” 9…Bg4

“I learned that the UIF forms require the employer to furnish ‘reason for termination of employment’ and they had planned to state ‘contract expired’ as they did with the other employees who had contracts. Their problem was that my contract has no expiry date. It is a permanent employment contract thus they would need me to resign first before we could proceed with the UIF. But they learned I was not willing to resign, my family would kill me for that stupid move. Guess what they did afterward?” 10. f3

“Don’t tell me they tried playing tricks on you, that can’t be right. Playing you is playing your kids and your mother man. They cannot be that heartless. Can they?” 10…Bd7

“Well I got a call from the director the next day after sending through the copy of my contract. We spoke for close to an hour and this whole time she is off-loading all of her personal financial troubles on my shoulders. She is telling me how tough the past few months have been for her and her family. And that time I’m wondering if she remembers that I too have a family that depends on me.” 11. Qe1

“That shameless Woman! Is she white?” 11…a5

“No. you know her man. I came with her to your school once when we had to sign that SLA. The one with the big eyes.” 12. a4

“Oh, that one with her model C English I attempted to promote? I should have promoted that pawn and then sacrificed it for entertainment if she is that callous.” 12…Qb6

“What makes you think she would allow you to promote? That woman can afford herself man. She is not desperate for promotion. Don’t make me laugh.” While laughing off his cocky remarks and moved 13. Kh1

He played 13…Be6 and said “Your problem is you think I attack alone when I approach a woman. I go in with Bishops and Sangomas all at once. They cannot all fail, can they?”

“Forget about her man, listen to what she says next on the call, she says; ‘oh hey, you know I just realized that the contract I gave you did not have an expiry date. That was such an amateur mistake on my part, doing things for myself for the first time, please forgive me. All our contracts are meant to be in line with our funding cycle and I did not fix that with yours , and now we have run out of funding and it poses a challenge. We have had to make some budget cuts due to our reduced funding and everybody got a pay cut, even I got one. So our budget for your program is also significantly reduced’. At that time, I’m wondering why it had to take her so long to tell me that. Three months! She then has the nerve to offer me a third of my salary and then qualifies it by saying ‘I know it is very little compared to what you were earning but you don’t have to take it, just think about it. Just know that this is what we can afford right now if you decided to come back’. I was defeated. I had no words. I just told her I would think about it.” 14. Qh4

“Damn man. I’m sorry to hear that. So does she now ask you to suffer the consequences of her mistake and be understanding? You have a permanent employment contract and she is talking you out of it by claiming she made an amateur mistake in drafting it?”

“That is exactly what she is asking and at that time she is getting paid two salaries for the same job!”

“So all this time you are suffering alone inside? Don’t do that man. This thing will eat you alive. People will think you have AIDS when its financial stress eating you up.” 14…Rfe8

“You know the most painful part is when electricity runs low like 1.1 units remaining or even the sugar running out and the kids are no longer sure if they should tell me or not because they know the financial situation is dire.  I used to shout at them whenever I discover something finished when I wanted to use it, asking why didn’t anyone say when they noticed; but now I just tuck my tail behind my legs and enjoy my tea without sugar.” 15. Bh6

“Hahaha oh, sorry man. I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing at the thought of a dog tucking its tail in, that’s a funny sight. Okay, if you win this game I will give you R100. Hell I will pay you just for beating you even.” 15…Nh5

“Man, I don’t want you R100. You know I was doing a tournament last week, so I’m okay for now. But I will take the R100 just to get another bottle of wine.” 16. Bxg7

“But on a serious note now, what are you going to do about this Million people?” 16…Kxg7

“What Can I do? I think that’s the better question. I have asked them to write me a dismissal letter stating their reason for laying me off but it has been two weeks and they still have not sent it. Maybe then I could enquire at CCMA if they had the right to do this to me. It’s a matter of knowing what is right and what is wrong. This just feels wrong to me, but maybe they have good reason for doing it. Slave traders also had to throw some slaves in the ocean to save their ships from sinking. There is no humane way to perform an inhumane act, is there?” 17. g4

“She did her best though, softening you up with her own sob stories? Making you feel like you were not alone? ‘we have all had to get a pay-cut.’ How much did she have to cut, this snob!” 17…Nf6

“The head needs more blood than the feet.” 18. Nf4

“The truth is for as long as you are not pursuing your own goals, you are just a tool for someone to use in pursuing theirs; so be prepared to get used, abused and refused! You have now been refused because they have no use for you. Maybe they found a replacement? We are all replaceable.” 18…Qb4

“Well that is something I’m still not sure how I feel about. I found out that they have replaced me with two of my own students. Maybe I should be proud!” 19. Nce2

“It’s your chance to move on up to the next chapter man. Find something that will fulfill you, generate you some income while still allowing you to keep some control of your life.” 19…Bd7

“I need something that will help slow my death, because the past few months have been moving very slow for me.” 20. g5

“What do you mean now?” 20…Ng8

“You don’t know the saying? ‘The faster you move, the slower you die.’? I think I heard it from a movie.” 21. Rg1

 “You know I don’t watch TV, I’m too grown to be programmed.” 21…Qd2

“ You can never be too grown to learn from others.” 22. Rbc1

“I read, dummy. You learn more from reading than from watching TV” 22…e5!

“ Says who? There is a lot more variety of information shared on TV than in anything you read” 23. Re1

“Information overload! Nobody really learns anything that lasts from TV. You Know the difference between Passive learning and Active learning?” 23…exf4

“ I do” I said, suddenly realizing that I may be losing this game. I played 24. Nxf4

“That’s where the difference is, TV can only affect how you feel about certain issues rather than teach you how to think around them. Your emotional faculties are more heightened than your cognitive faculties while you are watching TV” He said and then pushed 24…d5

“Yes, I get that. That is a results of the visual effects controlling your focus. But I’m sure it is different from watching a lecture on a certain topic, is it not?” 25. Ng2

Just like that, the conversation had taken a new direction. I have forgotten all my problems for the moment and I am able to entertain other thoughts. That on its own has healing powers. I felt a cool breeze flowing through my brain.

“It is still passive if you are just sitting and watching. It is very easy to get distracted while watching than when reading, don’t you understand? You know what, just forget it. Just play” 25…f5

“I get it. It is easier to get lost in your own thoughts when watching TV than when reading, but it doesn’t mean one does not wonder off while reading??” 26. e5

“Do you wonder off while playing Chess?” 26…Rxe5!

“Against a weaker opponent, yes!” 27. Rxe5

“Then you lack focus my boy…Check!” 27…Qxc1+

“Eish! I missed that, but that’s okay.” 28. Re1

“It is not okay my brother, you are bleeding now. You better take care of your kids. A man without children is a man without a future, don’t you know?” 28…Qxc2

I was about to play my queen to c7, 29. Qc7 but my opponent just pointed at the clock and smiled while shouting “Time!”

I had lost the game on time!

“I was distracted I lost track of time” I said, defending my bruised ego. “ Let us play another one.”

The Cape of Hopes

 This article is the last of three in the Cape series. The first two can be found below:

http://chasingraces.blogspot.com/2022/07/to-cape-with-team-mp-chess.html

http://chasingraces.blogspot.com/2022/07/in-cape-with-team-mpumalanga.html

On the 1^st of July, the first day of the Training Camp, we sat at the breakfast table with the team Managers and coaches. The aim was to ascertain what they had planned for the kids and whether or not it would be sufficient for this level of play. 

Dumisa and I were there as Technical Officials recommended by the  province to National, our roles in relations to Team Mpumalanga was quite unclear, that is why the current President could tell us to stay out of Team MP business and let him run down his ship. We complied, only because the tension was too much for us to continue attempting to reason with him.

We asked the team what equipment they had and what they had planned to do in the training camp. There were no clear answers and clearly no one willing to take charge as there was no Head-Coach to account. Since this was more of the technical part of Chess, Dumisa and I figured it was necessary that we take full control and lead the session.

We explained that this training session would need to serve as preparation for all parties involved; The players needed to have practice playing using clock and notating their moves (They had not been notating at all the qualifying levels). The Coaches would use the notations from the games played to assess the strength of their teams and use that to plan presentations of the aspect of the game they felt their players were lacking; also, this games could be used for doing post-game analysis with the players. The team managers could schedule the sessions, provide pens, notation pads and other assistance that both the players and coaches could need in these sessions.

The plan was clear and everyone had a role to play. I emphasized at some point that the role of the managers also included making sure that the coaches perform their tasks of offering post-game analysis to all players after the games, especially since there was no Head-Coach to manage the Coaches. The team managers were also responsible for making sure that the players go to the Team’s analysis room after finishing their games where they would find their coach waiting and ready to analyze and offer corrective inputs (whether a game was lost or won).

When we arrived at the training hall, we discovered that Team MP did not have Chess Clocks; no Demo-boards; no pens and notation pads. Just a few chess boards that the current president had the foresight to bring. This simply meant that the provincial chess team was never prepared to have a training camp.

We tried then and there to see what we could do with what we had; fortunately, one female team manager had few copies of notation pads for us to make copies of and hand to the players; the current president along with one of the team managers tried to organize some pencils; we then asked the players to use their cell phones to download the Chess Clock or the Lichess App which had a chess clock we could use.

All seemed to be in order and the training was going smoothly until we discovered that over half the players in Team MP did not know how to notate; more than half of them were not comfortable using the chess clock (the time pressure made them anxious, regardless of the time-control); and a great deal of them did not have a sufficient grasp of the Basic Opening Principles!

We had our work cut out for us. We separated the groups and agreed that we would have one group do a lesson on Chess notations, while another group does a session on the Basic Opening Principles. We asked the coaches to volunteer themselves where they felt most comfortable; they pulled back. Dumisa and I had to do those sessions too.

I presented the session on Opening Principles while Dumisa was doing notations with another group.

We did not want to have the players who already knew how to notate and played good chess to be left behind, so we arranged them and had them play a formal game with clocks and notations. Their games were to be analyzed by their coaches in their relative age groups.

The coaches were committed, present and wanted to be of service but they lacked in content. They talked, loud even but it was clear, even to the players, that they had no direction. In some cases it was the lack of coaching experience where a coach knew how to play but hardly ever made time to coach others, so he was unable to tell when a player was not following; jumped from one concept to the next without being able to connect the concepts or check whether the players were following.

In other cases, the coaches were just less skilled than the players they were coaching; the players had more playing experience and sometimes more understanding of the content and the coach was simply in too deep, so his ego got bruised, so he spoke louder changing the subject to the history of Openings and his former days as a chess player.

We tried organizing a session with the coaches so we could show them how to go about analyzing the players’ games but it felt like we were teaching Chess theory to the coaches now. The team of 28 players had only one Chess Coach and 7 managers, it was sad.

This had to be an opportunity for these kids to improve their understanding of chess as some of them were obviously afforded a Chess coach for the first time in this camp. Most of them had gotten to this level just by being the proverbial one-eyed man (or woman) in the land of the blind and the nationals were full of players who could see the full board all the time.

Another opportunity lost.

After Dumisa and I have moved to the hotel where the Technical Officials were accommodated, we could not have contact time with the players. We worked as officials for the full duration of the event and could not even steal some time to analyze games with them.

In between bathroom breaks from the playing hall, I would slide by the Team MP analysis room and find players sitting on the corner licking their wounds while coaches are enjoying a chess game between themselves. If I asked whether they had done analysis with the players, the common responses would be “their notations were not clear so we could not follow the game” (which made sense, somewhat)

This article is starting to drag; let me conclude with the obvious: When people who are appointed or voted into positions fail to play their roles well and fulfill their tasks, the children suffer the consequences.

There are children who were playing for the first and last time in the Schools Nationals Chess Championships this year because of their age. Their one-time experience has now become the opposite of what they had always dreamt it would be. I worry that such experiences ruin the game for the players and we end up losing them forever. Our communities are always offering alternative activities to the kid, activities which are significantly more destructive in nature. This is why when we catch some of the kids from falling in those social traps and offer them chess, we intend to show them their true worth and help them unleash their full potential so that they could help us recruit their peers and help us improve our communities through sport.

Suitable Coaches were available and willing to assist the province, and they will be available again next year. We can only hope that when the time comes again soon for the province to send players to the nationals, they are sure to appoint coaches that will have more to offer to the players in their development.

Bear in mind, the effects of losing a Chess game could be psychologically damaging to a person, especially if they do not understand how they lost. The role of a coach is sometimes to help you discover how you have lost, and show you how to do better next time, thus restoring hope.

Hope cures depression. Coaches are Healers!

Thank you for reading

 

 

 

In The Cape with Team Mpumalanga

 This article is the second part of the earlier published article titled: To The Cape with Team Mpumalanga which could be accessed on the link below

http://chasingraces.blogspot.com/2022/07/to-cape-with-team-mp-chess.html

We arrived in Cape Town at the Western Cape Sport School on the 30^th of June 2022. We had left Mpumalanga on 29 June and spent the night at a hotel in Bloemfontein for some rest. We had to wake up early in the morning to complete the remaining 1000 Kilometers to Cape Town.

The plan was for the team  to spend the first two days having a training camp to prepare the players for the battle ahead. I was there as a Technical Official along with Dumisa Nkosi another fellow Arbiter from the province. Each province was to bring two qualified Arbiters as Technical Officials to assist the National Organisers in the technical running of the event. The technical Officials were not part of the Provincial delegation, they were a part of the National team and therefore were the responsibility of the National Schools Chess structure. The National structure however only assumed responsibility of its Technical officials on the 3^rd of July which was the date of official arrivals and registrations. This meant that for the time being, we were part of the Mpumalanga Contingent and the players could benefit from our experience and expertise.

This article will focus on the non-technical challenges encountered that we believe may have had some devastating effects on the overall team morale and caused us to lose confidence in our leadership and ultimately perform as we did as a province. They include: 

1. Accommodation for the camp 

2. Catering at the Camp 

3. Team Management

4. Provincial Attire

Accommodation

The first two days at the first three nights spent in the Western Cape Sports School were a little hell for Team MP as a whole. We were sleeping at a hostel which had one thin blanket and the temperature felt like it was below zero degrees Celsius.  The boys’ teams (7 boys U/18 and 7 boys U/15) were clustered together in one room with 14 beds.

Catering

The food was always the same macaroni and cheese (and sometimes with mince making it look like a lasagna) for lunch and supper and bread with boiled eggs and either a soy Russian or beef sausage for breakfast (maybe some weet-bix and milk if you woke up early enough); no variety whatsoever.

The chess kids always cried of hunger and could not even focus on the little training we tried to provide for them. Some of them did not eat beef and thus had to starve when the macaroni was served with mince; others did not eat cheese and were also not provided with options on the lasagna days. Some felt the food was not enough and would get really hungry before the next meal could be served; if they ate breakfast at 08h00 which was two boiled eggs and two slices of bread, it would be 5 hours before they could eat lunch at 13h00, which was in some cases, something some players didn’t eat.

Management

This issues were reported to the teams managers to address or at least report and have them resolved as they affected the players wellness and could affect their performance.

When the current president was first told about these challenges on the phone by one coach, he responded that it was not his business as he was only there as Under 18 Boys team Manager. He then hung up the phone immediately. The secretary was called and informed of the matter, we figured she may have called her president to order as he then after came to attend the coach and promised to handle the issues with the officials the next day.

The coaches, managers and us Technical officials sat together and tabled the challenges that would lead to the Chess team not performing, which included the lack of Chess equipment (except for a few chess sets only), the terrible environment (some reported broken windows and doors in their rooms), the hot water that finished before everyone could shower and the terrible attitude of the kitchen staff (I called a few to order for berating the kids unnecessarily making them feel out of place).

These matters where meant to be presented at the Managers meeting with the Department of Sports officials to make them aware of the challenges we were faced with so they could do some corrections to help boost the morale of our players.

Our duly elected leader failed to present the challenges and our kids continued to suffer. I was shocked to hear in the next day, a child asking the kitchen which was serving beef burgers and chips, “what should I do since I do not eat beef?” and the Kitchen staff responded “you will eat chips, we do not have chicken burger patties!”.

I knew it was time for some serious intervention and shouted then and there “NEVER!!, THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN. WHAT ABOUT THOSE WHO DO NOT EAT CHIPS?”

It took three hours before they could have chicken prepared and some department officials had to give their store-bought chicken lunch in for the kids to eat.

 

Provincial Attire

On the last night of the training camp, the provincial colours are usually awarded (Handed) to the players and they get to try them on in preparation for the next day. The coaches and managers also get theirs which also look the same as the players’.

It has always been my understanding that the players took first preference in this as they were the ones competing and representing the province in these games. I was wrong.

The current Mpumalanga Schools Chess President collected the bags with one other manager, they called the coaches in a room and selected their own fitting attire and shoes, then went on to attend the players.

It was weird that some of the players wore the same size clothes and shoes with some of the coaches, yet the players ended up with over-sized track-suites and unfitting shoes mostly two sizes smaller.

They would rather look good in the kids attire and have the kids wearing humiliating over-sized attire and painfully tight-fitting sneakers.

I remember suggesting to the current president that he should claim back the shoes from the adults and have the kids try them on first as they wore the same sizes. I was there when the coaches and managers claimed the same sizes that the kids where crying for, yet they decided to keep them.

We had to run around asking to switch sizes with the girls’ teams and also with the other sporting codes to try and find the players proper fitting sizes. Their president was unmoved by this challenged faced by the players. Instead of asking his managers to take responsibility and trade the fitting shoes with the players, he had the nerve to ask the kids to be strong and wear the smaller sized sneakers at least for tomorrow.

It was clear there and there, that this President thinks he represents the teachers instead of the players. Maybe he is a union shop steward in the school where he works and now confuses his roles.

It really made no sense to the kids as to why, after having filled-in form where they had to write down their sizes, they would now come to be expected to wear over-sized clothes and painfully tight sneakers. It was an embarrassment that their president could not understand and therefore could not present their pain to the powers that be. Some kids actually cried when they had they would have to wear these over-sized multiple times folded track pants and jackets throughout the competition. I personally saw some kids walking with a painful limp wearing sneakers one or two sizes smaller because they could not get assisted.

One of the kids I had referred to his coach to switch with, the Interim Mpumalanga Chess President for two reasons:

1.      They both wore a size 5

2.      The Interim president had received the same sneakers in the previous National championships held in February, the player did not.

 

I later discovered that the kid was talked out of the exchange and forced to wear the smaller size and remain in pain. I was disappointed.

It turns out two managers and a coach all wore a size ten, two players needed a size ten sneakers and could not get them; also, three coaches wore a size 8, two players needed a size 8 and could not get them.

It is hard to believe that the team of coaches and managers had the interest of the players at heart. It is no wonder the Provincial Chess team performed poorly. The morale of the players had been in the hands of adults who were there to serve their own personal interests at the cost of the kids.

The next article will focus on the technical challenges that are responsible for the  result suffered. 

To The Cape with Team MP Chess

 So much has happened leading up to the selection of the Mpumalanga Schools Chess team to represent the Province in the National Schools Sports Championships in the Cape. Starting from the age-groups confusion that we faced in the earlier stages when we were informed that the U/18s were not taking part; to the later exclusion of the U/13 and inclusion of both the U/15 and U/18s only.

Even after all this, we still had to battle with the placing of players in relevant age-groups since the South African Schools Chess Association has placed limits in the ages of players in each category.

E.g. U/13 (2010,2011 and 2012), U/15 (2007,2008 and 2009), U/18 (2006,2005 and 2004)

Take note of this as it later became a bigger issue than we had anticipated. (much later, in the third article of this series)

This article will focus on the selection of the entire Mpumalanga Chess contingent, the events leading to the elections and the consequences suffered by the children (the Chess players)

On the 28^th of May 2022 I was the Chief Arbiter at the Ehlanzeni District Schools Chess Selections when both the then President (Chairperson) and  Secretary of the Mpumalanga Schools Chess Organization asked to make an announcement to the teachers in attendance before giving out the results.

The announcement was that this was election year for the Mpumalanga Schools Chess Structure and that they would need help in retaining the two crucial positions they held as a district (Those being the Chairperson and secretary positions).

The Secretary reiterated the matter when she took the platform and emphasized the significance of having had these positions in the region. She stated that this meant that the district got to be the first to receive information and act on time thus enabling their kids not to miss out on opportunities.

She then apologized with some regret, that she would not be running for office this time around since she has too many commitments on her plate; she then strongly urged all in attendance to do all in their power to ensure that the region does not lose their chairperson and support him as he will be running again.

The event went on and we announced the names of the players who would represent the district in the provincials on the 11^th of June in Middelburg. Later on an announcement was made that on the 10^th of June there would be the elections that were spoken about and each district was to bring 10 representatives to vote and also to be voted for in the new committee.

The president of the structure asked me as the appointed Chief Arbiter for the Provincial Schools Chess selections, to travel with them to assist in the preparations and set-up  of the playing venue, have a sleep-over in Middelburg so we are the first to arrive at the playing venue and start as soon as players arrive.

This meant that I got to be the fly in the wall as all this unfolded and did not get asked to declare any form of confidentiality, verbal or signed. I am sharing this right now because I do not wish to see something similar to it happen in the future. Also because I believe that there needs to be an improvement on how elections are done for such crucial positions that affect the future of many of our children.

In the transport on the way to Middelburg for the elections on the 10^th of June, early in the morning, the president and secretary started  the discussion with the district representatives. It came out during  the discussion that the president has had some discussions with the regional leaders of Gert Sibande and Nkangala District and they had arranged that the chairperson of Gert Sibande will be given the Secretariat while Ehlanzeni would retain the Chairperson and Nkangala would take the Treasury (of a structure without funds). Bohlabela was not involved in the discussions and would be engaged in the meeting on arrival.

The Secretary vigorously expressed her disappointment with the arrangement; she was disappointed that the president did not consult with her first before giving her position away to Gert Sibande, and in particular, the current chairperson of the Gert district whom she felt was not up to the task of being Provincial secretary. She suggested that they make some serious changes to this arrangement of she will not stand by it when it is time to vote.

The President reminded the Secretary that it was her who gave him the greenlight to make arrangements to at least retain the Presidency for the region even if it meant giving up the secretariat; it was her who said she did not want to get involved in the arrangements since she did not intend to run and thus wished not to be a part of the discussions. He also explained to the representatives that the secretary never gave him any conditions for the trade-offs and that is why he was surprised to see her expressing concern in any possible outcomes.

The secretary then uttered a shocking statement backed up by some unrecorded complaints she received from teachers and parents in the previous schools nationals which took place in Bloemfontein this February 2022. These complaints pointed out to the incompetency of the Gert Sibande candidate according to the Secretary. We all wished she had communicated those complaints to some structure as that falls under her role as Secretary; then everyone would share her sentiments and understand why she would say the following :

 “I would rather stay as secretary than allow that man to lead our province to ruins. We will rather trade-off the Presidency that lose the Secretariat to Gert”

After having uttered these shocking words, the mood changed and the whole district was now divided in half, everyone uncertain as to whom they would vote with when it all comes down.

The whole meeting was chaotic as it had to be run by the two of them. They could not work together and everyone in the room could sense the tension and the lack of respect. The secretary would speak while the chairperson was still addressing the room; either making a point of correction without permission or addressing someone across the room without regard for protocol.

It was all chaotic until one attendant suggested that they both leave the chairing to a MPUSSO (Mpumalanga Schools Sports Organization) representative so they  could facilitate the elections.

MPUSSO came on and suggested that regions quickly hold a caucus so they can have a unified decision. They were also to decide if they preferred to vote as regions or as individuals.

It was decided that members in attendance would vote as individuals and each region was to bring ten voting members. It turned out that Bohlabela was the only region that brought ten, while Ehlanzeni brought seven, Nkangala six and Gert Sibande brought only three members, thus shooting itself in the foot.

The Secretary then spoke to the Bohlabela members and promised them the Presidency if they voted her in as Secretary. It turned out that the only necessary arrangement to determine the steering of the Mpumalanga Schools Chess Structure rested on this single arrangement. Voting was done and the fate was sealed.

A new president was elected and the Secretary still remained the same. Everyone else left after the elections and only myself and the former president remained to prepared for the games the next day. Later that day we attended a meeting reporting on the state of readiness to the provincial officials with the former president; then on the day of the tournament, he was still very much hands on in ensuring that everything went on smoothly.

As soon as the selections were done and it was time to select the coaches, managers and officials to travel to the Cape, the incoming President and the Secretary held a meeting together deciding who  to select. It was chaos once again. Everyone wanted to go; everyone felt as if they deserved to go!

I remember in my opening remarks as Chief Arbiter for the event, I had introduced to the players and teacher, a number of highly talented out-of-School young Chess players who had accomplished so much for the province in Chess. I did that in order to assist the leaders in their task of selecting coaches.

All the players introduced are well-known in the provincial chess circles; they were Mayibongwe Khoza (MD), FM Banele Mhango, Adolph Nkosi and Lindokuhle Bhila, all of whom had represented the province in the Nationals and all had previously won medals both as individuals and as a team. All of whom understood clearly the pressure of competing in the name of your Province and could help the players both in preparation for matches and in the post-match analyses. They had the players’ respect as role models.

In my previous experience of this types of selections, there used to be order for the following reasons: there was a clear guideline as to who selects managers and who is legible for selection as a manager; who selects coaches and who is legible for selection as a coach.

The team managers were selected by the code convener which was either the President or the Secretary (or together in communication). The team manager had to be a school teacher with the most number of players in the team coming from their school, circuit, sub-district or district . As an example, the provincial team manager for the U/18 boys would have to be a male teacher who has at least three or more players of the seven in the team coming from either his school or district.

The selection of coaches as a matter of technical accuracy was the role of federations. Federations had the database of qualified and active Chess Coaches to recommend to the Schools Structure with motivation. This is why in previous years, the federations Head-Coach was responsible for the selection of Coaches and mostly picked from the coaches who had players they coached qualify for the nationals.

Mpumalanga Chess Federation is currently inactive as almost all positions are now vacant, except for the position of Interim-President. Most qualified chess coaches have since left active chess due to the toxic nature of chess politics and also for some, due to the lack of activity that resulted from the covid restrictions and lock-downs.

This indeed meant that the teachers in the Chess structure had to handle these chess matters on their own.

The Current Schools Chess President took the responsibility of Team Manager for the U/18 boys despite the fact that not even one player from Bohlabela district qualified for the provincial U/18 Chess team. They then appointed a School Teacher as a Coach for the U/18 boys.

The Under 18 Girls were given to a passionate and experienced female school teacher to manage;  She had three players from her school and district who had made the U/18 girls team. Perfect fit. Their team Coach was Mayibongwe Khoza, an experienced Chess player as indicated above.

The Under 15 Boys were first given to a teacher from Bohlabela region( even though Bohlabela has no players in the category) to manage, but he later withdrew for some yet to be disclosed reason. He was later replaced with another teacher from Bohlabela Region who has never had any experience with Chess. He is apparently very active in Volley ball and by his own admission,  knew nothing about Chess. Interestingly he was not even at the provincial selections on the day and was never introduced to the kids until we arrived in Cape Town.

The Under 15 boys were Coached by the current Interim President of Mpumalanga Chess; he had enough of his players playing in the competition, from the Under 18 girls down to the U/15 boys he was responsible for.

The Under 15 girls were given to a very active teacher from the Gert Sibande District who had enough players from both her school and district in all the categories including the one she was given charge of. The coaching responsibility for this team was given to yet another school teacher.

It appeared on the day that MD and the interim President of Mpumalanga Chess were momentarily removed from the list of coaches by the current President of Mpumalanga Schools Chess due to the fact that they were not teachers; they were replaced by teachers who had voted on the previous day and thus deserved a place in the bus!

The Secretary was swift to correct this matter as MD is one Coach she works with in her sub-district and has assisted her in running the selections. The Interim President could also not be removed as he represented the federation and was very active in assisting Nkangala district in their selections.

It became a heated discussion as some teachers were really disappointed because they could not be rewarded for their hard work of ushering in a new regime in Mpumalanga Schools Chess (half new to be fair).

The fate of the Province was set then. I know a lot of people think that the Mpumalanga Chess Team lost in Cape Town, but I believe they lost in Middelburg when the selections were made. This is like one of those Chess games which are lost in the opening stage yet the player would be convinced they made a miscalculation or mistake in the Middle-game that cost them severely. The fact is, the player went to the middle-game carrying a positional weakness from the Opening; Just like we went to Cape Town carrying our own weaknesses.

The next article will focus on the happenings in cape town which has revealed the true characters of these members who were selected to assist and take care of the kids.

It will be titled: In the Cape with Team MP and will detail how the kids were failed by all the provincial stake holders

 http://chasingraces.blogspot.com/2022/07/in-cape-with-team-mpumalanga.html

 

 

 

Our Champion Returns

Tonight we welcome back home our Fide Chess Master Banele Mhango as he returns from his most testing battle thus far.

FM Banele Mhango contemplating his next move at the AICC

FM Banele Mhango went toe-to-to with the greatest Chess players Africa had to offer at the just concluded African Individuals Chess Championship in Malawi. He has shown true character and resilience of strength as he fought (mentally) three Chess Grand Masters in games that lasted 4 hours on avarage. We are proud of the fact that among his four victories and three draws, one win was against an Egyptian Grand Master.

Banele only lost two games out of all 9 games played and they were both against much higher rated Grand Masters.

This has been the most testing and invariably the most rewarding chess competition the 18-year-old Master has taken part in thus far. He returns home with a staggering rating gain of 124 Elos( points) taking him leaps towards his goal of achieving the Grand Master title, or at least the International Master title which is a step above his current Fide Master title.

We would like to extend our deepest gratitude to Touch A Million NPO for making this trip possible.

DreamKids Chess Coaches

"Banele Mhango is one of the Dreamkids Afterschool program Chess coaches, and his successes are a symbol of hope for the kids whose lives we are touching in our programs. We are in every bit proud of all his successes thus far and we are happy to have been part of his journey." Ms. Shirley Khoza, Director of Touch A Million NPO

Photos ectracted from the African Inividual Chess Championships 2021 Facebook page on the following link: https://web.facebook.com/2021-Africa-Individual-Chess-Championship-102773208603604

Light Reflections

 

I called an old high school friend today, I was desperate for cash so I asked him if he could buy a book from me. For only R200, judging from his social media posts, that should be nothing to him. I explained I had written a book and would be happy if he could get a copy for himself and read my story…he was all too happy to support! Support! I didn’t want to use that word. Support! This word has the ability to make me feel less sufficient as an adult! It just reminds me of my daughters and how I am unable to support them. It just reminds me of how dependent on others for support…others to support me so I could eat from time to time; like my mother buying me groceries because I cannot afford to care for myself; or my current girlfriend buying me clothes because she thinks the rags I own make me look poor. And now my old friend would be happy to support me! By buying just one copy of a book that cost me the most money I had ever held in years to get.

I hadn’t worked for money in a while. For some reason, charging people for chess lessons felt like a very desperate move on my part, so I stopped charging. You would charge what you think the lesson is worth, and people will complain and tell you what they can afford. You would argue about how all this money only covers the transport to their venue and they would argue that not a lot of kids are interested in paying for something they don’t understand; which really sounds stupid because that should be the one thing they spend on, getting to understand what they don’t understand! But winning an argument with a potential client means losing the client, or so we have been told. Thus in situations like these, for fear of diminishing the value of the game in the eyes of bystanders, I always feel it is necessary to just let everybody come attend the class for free instead of charging peanuts for lessons. And so it had been like that for years.

If you asked I would tell you it was worth it, doing it for free! It felt like I owned the process. If no one paid me, it meant that no one could tell me a thing when it comes to the quality of the lessons I gave. I was doing it for me! So when I dedicated extra hours to it, it as to prove to myself that everything I touch turns to gold! It was a dedication to prove to myself that I cannot make money, but I can make a difference! I so desperately wanted to make a difference that I forgot about the importance of money; except for the times when my mother asked if I planned to find a real job; or when my daughter called saying she missed me because she hadn’t seen me in a while; then I would have to scrape for some cash to get me to Jo’burg to see her for a few days and come back.

It didn’t matter if I ate or not on the way. I was already used to not eating. Sometimes I would spend a whole day without eating and not really knowing whether I would eat the next day or not. But I tell you, each time I got in front of these kids to talk about the pawns and the knights; the rooks and the bishops; the Kings and the Queens, I would feel as powerful as the Queens and as important as the Kings! These two or three hours where the most special hours of all my days. I just wished they would last longer, but I couldn’t keep the kids all day with me!

So that was that. To reminisce of these moments and not feel like my life was wasting away, I would write about my experiences like a sociologist involved in some crucial social research with the potential of changing the fate of rural communities. It made sense because I am of course a Sociology graduate, though I was as broke as a dropout. I wrote about my pains being this poor with so much knowledge of such valuable things; I wrote about the circumstances I found myself in and what may have led to it; my struggles with love and relationships because, who would want to be with a poor smart-ass?  I wrote down all my feelings just to keep living and feel there was meaning to all this charade. I wrote to ward off depression and anxiety especially when the nights got colder and more lonelier. I wrote to give value and meaning to these hunger pangs that seemed to have found a home in me.  I wrote until I had enough to compile a book of reflections and I called it “The Black Chronicles- Reflections from the Dark Side”

I had not felt so driven about personal achievement for a long time until that book. I was so committed to seeing it come to be! The culmination of all my education and sufferings coming to one piece of work. I found a guy who claimed he was a book publisher and he promised to make all my desires into a reality for a fee.

He charged me money I did not have; money I had never seen in a very long time, if not ever. But I was so determined and confident that the book had to come out; I was so sure it could add value to me and to others who may have the opportunity to read it.

I spoke to my younger brother and all he could spare was a thousand rands; my mother also contributed the same but two thousand rands was just too far from the target amount. I got a promotional job for a week and a few days which paid a few good thousands; but after tax, there was little good left of the thousands, so I still had around three thousand five hundred rands towards the R6500 this guy needed. That is when I called out to a good friend of mine named thabo, and without too many questions, Thabo immediately sent the R3000 to the guys account.

I felt like my life was shifting towards the right direction. I felt like my dreams were at that point validated by this grandiose gesture from this friend of mine and I felt that with such support (yes, support!) nothing was beyond my reach.

A week later, this guy whom I will now refer to as Mr. Born Great, he calls to tell me my book appears longer than expected and the printers needed extra money for the number of copies we had ordered. That was 100 copies ordered. The printers needed another R1500, he said.

That was money I did not have; money I had no way of getting. My hopes began fading. I could not go back to Thabo and undermine his great gesture by asking him for more after he had just given so much. It wouldn’t be right, morally speaking.

Everyone else, I had already tried and they had given me their reasons why they were unable to assist before, so it would be useless to go to them now with a new story hoping they change theirs. Everyone I had asked, except my girlfriend at the time. I had to swallow what little pride I had left and ask my employed girlfriend to loan me money I otherwise had no way of paying back.

I would like to pretend that this situation presented a huge paradigm shift for me but the truth is I had learned long ago that in a desperate situation, any help is good help regardless of whom it comes from. I also thought it would be unfair to not allow her the opportunity to offer me help when I needed it. However, I hated the fact that at that point I was starting to doubt the sincerity of Mr. Born Great, thinking why would he send me a quote without knowing the actual size of the book; but I quickly shut off that questioning voice because I could not convince anyone to finance a project I have doubts about.

Juliet gave me the money and Mr. Born Great was paid up. We waited for the 100 copies as promised and a serious marketing plan to get us our money back as soon as possible.

I couldn’t wait to hold the book in my hand and speak about it to anyone who would listen; Blood, Sweat and Tears beautifully packaged in an amazing golden cover designed by the extremely talented Jolene Nkuna of SerutciPhothography.

The moment came and I seized it in my hands; my life here in my hands, I thought. I felt so ashamed that I had packaged my pain in a book for anyone to read about. I just wished it would be sold somewhere far from me where no one personally knew me. But the books where here now and it was upon me to sell them. All 50 that Mr. Born Great brought instead of the 100 we agreed on. He would sell the others from his side in Pretoria and Nkomazi through his shops.

I opened the book and was struck with instant grief at the sight of the dedication page:

I dedicate this book to my late sister Beatrice Bhila as her soul c

      ontinues to rest in peace

What happened to the word “continues”? why is it broken? Mr. Born Great had no answers! I looked through the whole book and it appeared all the pages had the same problem! Words were sloppily broken stealing away the reading flow and pleasure from the reader. It was just a painful labour reading the book. It was not what anyone expects when they pay to get a book printed and certainly nothing like anyone would expect when they buy a book.

I was broken. So much money wasted printing this mistakes! Why didn’t he ask for a proof copy? Why did he not fix the mistake before going to print? Its not like he was chasing a deadline?!

I wondered how this mistake happened until I figured it out I had sent him a PDF ready to print copy which was properly aligned but he requested I send him a word document so he could do some edits. It turned out that the Word doc program I had used to type the book was not compatible with the one he was using to make the edits. In fact, there was no edit that needed his hand, he just wanted to add his name to it and claim that it was

“Published and Distributed by: Born Great Movement”

It was so disappointing that he would rather have his name on my product even if it meant compromising the quality of the product itself!

 I confronted him about it and he suggested that we try and sell the book because he was sure a lot of readers wouldn’t mind the “minor setbacks”. He promised that if it proved to be a problem, he would print fresh copies using his own money. That was the last time I spoke to him. He had since blocked my numbers and disappeared with the rest of my books and left me with these erroneous reading obstacle course!

And there I was calling this old friend for a sale and he says he would be happy to support me by buying a book. I was all too happy to hear him say these assuring words. I was so glad that R200 was coming my way just in time for my older daughter’s birthday. I would buy cake for R80 and a 2 liter soft drink for R20 or so…I’m not quite sure how much those cost, haven’t bought one in a while. The other R100 would get me 2 braai packs of chicken to hopefully last me for the month. I guess it makes sense to use the word support after all!

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The Black Chronicles and my other books are available on eBook from Amazon through the link below:

https://www.amazon.com/Eddie-Bhila/e/B08F3HG71F

Hard copies can be purchased via Takealot through the link below :

The Coach Life Adventures Through Chess

https://www.takealot.com/the-coach/PLID65914423

The Coach Chess Manual

https://www.takealot.com/the-coach-chess-manual/PLID69487127

Wine and Tears

Wine and Tears

Hell I’m not drunk. Just a little tipsy to be honest. I drank so much the liquid is starting to seep through my eyes. Maybe I am a little emotional tonight. I get like that when I drink alone. It’s a sad experience really; I guess the true danger of alcohol that they don’t put on the labels: reduces driving ability but could also drive you insane if you drink it alone.

Why am I drinking alone when I have such a big family? My kids are grown now, I should be drinking and talking to them about life and love. But none of them are with me. All with their mothers, it’s sad. I swore I would never be like my father, but what the hell did I know swearing on things I had little control over?! We are all product of the same system: fathers go away in search of money believing families need money to survive; you cannot live on love, they say. Well it appears generations will suffer for lack of love as a result of such shallow beliefs. They love their work for sure; spending so much time on it could make it your life. Hell my grandfather spent so much time at his work he ended up never coming back home till he died…in the gold mines!

My father worked Monday to Monday, sunrise till sunset. The only time you ever saw him was when he was tired and about to rest…right after he finished drinking his beer. Makes you wonder where in the world he got the time to make 27 children with 7 different women! I guess you do make time for the things you do love after all. I’d be a little different if I got a little bit of love from him, probably.

Yet now I’m grown and trying to start a new family every so often…and always seem to be failing. I’m like a checkers player trying to play a chess game! I don’t know how to do this; and maybe all these women I am attracted to have the same problem too. We are trying to build a family when we ourselves are products of broken families; hell the only prototype of a family that we have is filled with hate; anger and a whole lot of fear!!

I read there was a great man that once said “if you love your children, get a business, not a job”. Hopefully a business would not steal you from your family; hell it will allow you to take your kids with you to work and maybe one day it will become theirs. Now all this time my father spent on his work could be something we all share if it was spent on his own business.

But then again, what do I know, right? We are all products of the same system. Maybe he also tried, and failed. Just like I keep trying and still failing. Now my biggest fear is never being able to love my children, and they grow up to be just as loveless as I am: hell it’s hard to expect that their mothers give them the love I cannot give to them. I happen to believe mothers need love for them to be able to pass it on to the children, otherwise they get drained of the little they have and get bitter; then the kids will suffer the wrath. Crazy ideas I have really, it must be the wine. But truth is I have seen something that makes me say this; see when the mother is abused by the father, they pass the abuse on to the child. And similarly if the mother is loved by the father, they pass on the love to the child: physically abused mothers physically abuse their own children; emotionally abused mothers emotionally abuse their children! I’m starting to sound like a professional of sorts, huh! Red wine will do that to you; make you feel smarter than you actually are. Well I do have a little bit of education but it still does not qualify me to make such assertions. Just my fears really; my personal worries.

What if I end up alone; with my seed spread widely across the country and yet I am here, alone; drinking myself to sleep countless nights in a row. Drinking oneself to sleep is no different from crying yourself to sleep. Ask me I know. You wake up with the sadness still lingering waiting for night to fall, and you are alone again; then thoughts start flooding back one by one.

How did I mess it up with baby mama number two; we were both grown and ready to be responsible, but what went wrong? Was I too impatient with her and failed to understand that she still had a role to play in her mother’s house? Maybe it was her fault; she was trying to be something to everybody; a good sister, a good friend, a good employee, a good daughter, a good neighbour, a good colleague, a good aunt, a good niece and even a good acquaintance to some. I know she was a good mother too but I did not feel she was a good lover. She divided up her time so much there was too little left for me. Maybe I was too demanding; maybe the problem was I needed too much of her time and expected that she let go of some of her roles to make time for me and our child; give us a chance to be a family. But what do we know about family, right?

I remember once she asked; “if I don’t go to work this weekend as you ask, will you be able to give me the money I stand to make working weekend? I didn’t think so!” 

She was right, I did not have that money, but I also didn’t think I needed to buy her time. Well as she made it clear, I could not afford her time. I guess that made me feel like I was not man enough. It ended. I got tired of being made to feel like less of a man; whatever that means. Hell I don’t even know what it means to be a man!

Maybe number three would have worked out if I was not trying to balance out 1 and 2 while I was with her. I kept trying to keep contact with both children and their mothers while she was pregnant and sometimes the phone would ring while she was trying to speak to me about her worries especially being so close to giving birth. I know she felt the birth of our child was not as special for me as it was for her; this being her first and for me only the third. After she gave birth to our daughter, this being my third daughter, she felt there was no reason to continue our relationship.

She claims she saw it in my face that I wasn’t so excited. And maybe if it was a boy like the doctor thought it would be, I would have been happier and our relationship would have a chance but nah! I think she got pregnant too quick; before she had a good grasp of my situation.

Well now baby number four was a boy…that too did not survive. Well I have been drinking ever since. Whoever thinks I have a drinking problem is not looking deep enough; that’s like saying the person who cries themselves to sleep has a crying problem. I do have a problem and drinking only helps me manage it. I know it won’t go away, whether I feed it wine or not. If you ask me what problem I have, I would tell you I have a love problem; coming from a system that did not allow me to get love and ultimately unable to give it. One day I will get it right, but till then I’ll just keep drinking myself to sleep while trying to drive the tears away.

                                                                                                                                                Written by Eddie Bhila

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